Earlier today Warner Bros. released the title of the second Fantastic Beasts movie along with the first official promotional picture. As soon as we were able to stop screaming (approx. three hours later) we realized we have SO. MANY. QUESTIONS.
BUT NEVER FEAR—we are here to help add to the already dominating chaos. Let the pandemonium ensue.
First of all, the title of the movie is Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald and it will be released one year from now on November 16th, 2018.
1. Is it November 16th, 2018 now? How about now?
2. Will the movie focus on Grindelwald’s rise to evil? Was he always evil? Will we learn about Grindelwald’s past?
2a. Does this mean Grindelwald will escape soon?
2b. Is Grindelwald a Fantastic Beast?
2c. What are these crimes of Grindelwald’s and what is Dumbledore planning to do about them?
2d. How long will it take to see a Dumbledore/Grindelwald confrontation? Will they choose to save it for the grand finale in the fifth movie? Can I actually wait that long for a Dumbledore/Grindelwald wizard duel scene??
3. Who is that bae sitting in the center of the picture? Is that Newt’s celebrated war hero brother? (Also, I want to know more about this war that he was in!)
3a. Does his positioning in this picture symbolize that his story arc will take center stage in this movie?
3b. Why am I getting dark vibes from him?
5. Zoë Kravitz is a goddess as Leta Lestrange.
5a. We realize that’s not a question. Neither is this.
6. Did Leta Lestrange break Newt’s itty bitty heart by getting involved with his less awkward/more assertive looking brother?? *GASP* SOMEBODY, HOLD MY EARRINGS!!
6a. ARE THEY ENGAGED??? (LOOK AT THE RING ON HER ALL IMPORTANT FINGER. TELL ME THAT’S NOT AN ENGAGEMENT RING. YOU KNOW IF THIS WAS TMZ THEY’D BE LOWERING DOWN FROM TREES MISSION IMPOSSIBLE STYLE TO GET PICS OF THAT THING.)
7. KOWALSKI IS BACK! I NEED TO STOP SCREAMING!
8. Tina’s new hairstyle style is giving us life.
9. Credence is alive! Is he still an obscurus? Has he learned to control it? Will he be on Newt’s side through this new stage in fighting against Grindelwald’s growing reign of evil?
10. Who is the girl sitting next to him? How did they meet? Is she good to him? Does she treat him right? We’re hearing rumbles that she’s something called a “Maledictus” which is someone who “suffers from a blood curse that turns them into a beast.” WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?!?!
11. ERMAGERD JUDE LAW AS DUMBLEDORE!!!…? (It’s a question. See the question mark?)
11a. Is the wand he’s holding in this picture the one Ollivander sold to him as a kid before going off to Hogwarts? Could Ollivander have sold Dumbledore his wand? Would he have been too young to be a wandmaker? Did an older relative of Ollivander’s sell Dumbledore his wand? Did Dumbledore and Ollivander go to Hogwarts together? Or did Ollivander skip Hogwarts deciding to focus solely on the family trade? Is there a reason it’s so similar looking to the Elder Wand? Do you guys realize that from 1945 until 1997 Dumbledore had uninterrupted possession of the Elder Wand? That it literally had to be pried from his cold lifeless fingers? Can you believe at one point Draco Malfoy was the master of the Elder Wand? Can you imagine how he felt when he found out?
11z. Why does Dumbledore look like he tried to pull a Marky Mark swag move at the last second before the picture was taken and almost didn’t make it?
12. You may not like him, readers, but you can’t deny, Grindelwald’s got style. (Here’s a question mark to make it officially a question. “?“)
13. Is it November 16th, 2018 now???